What I'll Be Doing Next Week

I'm taking a week-long vacation to spend some time with my family and friends. It has only been a few months since my trip to Arizona, and yet I feel a deep need to step way from my life here in Baltimore and enjoy some simpler things. I've mentally tallied a list of things I'm hoping to do while I'm away. It's not a to-do list so much as an if-I-feel-like-it list. I want to unwind, relax, revel in the presence of some of my favorite people—which means I want to be open to opportunities, events and experiences that might not be on this list. I also want to make time for the things I truly enjoy and don't spend enough time doing during my normally hectic and over-scheduled days.

If time and the Universe allow, I'd like to:

• Eat a dinner alone with my mother, catching up and really BEING with one another.
• Spend time sorting through at least one room with my father, who is preparing to sell his house.
• Practice yoga by the lake at sunrise.
• Write. Write. Write. Whatever strikes my fancy.
• Read.
  
• Visit my favorite parts of my hometown and journal about my experiences there.
• Have dinner at Niagara Falls with family.
• Take pictures of everything.
• Notice the beauty around me.
• Take quiet walks by myself.
• Breathe in the clean, fresh air.
• Work one day on The Book Proposal.
• Be present wherever I am and whatever I am doing.
• Watch the parade and enjoy a barbecue.
• Run into old friends and talk like we never skipped a beat.
• Eat mindfully and consciously.
• Take my nephew to a movie.

As you can see, I have high hopes for my time away. No matter what is on that list, my real goal is to refresh my spirit. It's been a long winter and a hectic spring. This vacation is meant to be a cleanse of sorts, a time to reconnect to my body, mind and spirit in a way that has seemed impossible over the last several months. I think some sun, fun and family is just what my heart ordered.

Have a wonderful Memorial Day weekend. While you're enjoying parades and picnics and backyard barbecues, as I will be, please take some time to remember and recognize the sacrifices of our service men and women and their families. And take some time to reconnect with and rejuvenate yourself, as well. You deserve it.

Another Local Summer

This week I saw the blog post I'd been waiting for: One Local Summer is back! After a really successful OLS last year, Farm to Philly is hosting this event again and I'm all signed up. I really enjoyed the challenge of trying to build at least one completely local meal a week all summer long.

In fact, while the challenge hasn't even started, I spent the morning walking around the farmer's market looking for local meal inspiration. There's not a whole lot to be had this early in the season, but there were plenty of herbs, greens, lettuces and two of my favorites: rhubarb and asparagus.

Unfortunately, I didn't go with much money, so I ended up spending what I had on seedlings for my containers--three different varieties of basil, some dill and a lettuce garden. I'll be doing some planting this week to get my container garden going. I need some soil and a couple more containers to make room for my lettuce varieties. I'll also be cleaning out my refrigerator and freezer of any perishables to make room for what I bring home next week. I won't be caught short on cash again!

Part of my excitement about the CSA, farmer's market and my own little garden comes from the fact that I haven't felt very good about my diet lately. For several months now I've been eating crap, moving very little and paying the price. My mood has been "blah", my energy has been low, and my body...well, my body isn't happy. With the return of spring and the promise of fresh fruits and vegetables, I'm getting motivated to be more creative in the kitchen and start enjoying my food again.

Here's to a long growing season and healthy, local food! If you're interested in joining in, the One Local Summer Challenge starts on June 1st, so go sign up now.

Things to Come

Hello, my blog friends. I miss you.

Fear not, I'm still around. I'm just a little overwhelmed by life lately. I'm mentally exhausted by my "real" job these days. Not to complain, because I'm extremely grateful to HAVE a "real" job right now. That said, things are a bit crazy at the office and long days with serious stress and without time for exercise leave little energy for anything other than passive experiences like watching movies, listening to NPR, cuddling with My Love and the cat, and typing the occasional tweet.

When I do have the mental energy to think, I've been sprucing things up and finding more focus for my writing blog, making sure I meet my commitments to the other places I write and brainstorming ideas for getting paid for my words.

The spring sunshine is starting to energize me, though. I'm getting excited for fresh fruits and vegetables from the farmers' market and CSA shares again. I hope you're ready for another few months of posts focused on what I'm eating (and maybe even growing -- I'm planning another container garden). I can't wait for fresh greens, asparagus, tomatoes, strawberries, watermelon, corn...

What are you up to these days?

Sunday Scribblings: Scary Times

It's been quite a while since I participated in Sunday Scribblings, but this week's prompt seemed to so perfectly describe my life these days that I decided to jump back in.

Prompt #158: Scary

Have you ever wished you could see what the future would hold for you?

I've always been one of those people who would say, "Yes! Of course!", if asked this question. The irony here is that I'm at a place in my life where I can be pretty certain of exactly where things are headed and what my future holds - my near future at least - and I'm not sure I like having this certainty. It rarely occurred to me that I might not like what I would see in the crystal ball. Or that even if I did like what I saw, I might not like knowing it.

In fact, I'm finding it a bit scary that my life seems to be laid out before me. What should be comforting - the knowledge that I'm getting exactly what I hoped for, that things are falling into place just where I wanted them to - is making me anxious and antsy.

I'm grateful for every step that brings me closer to my writing dreams. I'm excited for the growth of my relationship with My Love and for a future that includes marriage and children. And yet I'm scared and shaky. The realization that walking through each of these open doors closes hundreds of others makes me fearful. Sure, I wouldn't have chosen to walk through most of those doors that closed anyway. But just knowing that my choices are becoming more limited at every fork in the road makes my stomach sink.

I like options. I like freedom. I like opportunities. Call me selfish, call me confused, call me crazy, but I want to have both. Can't I? Can't I have what I want and still be free to chose something else later?

I'm grateful for all the blessings in my life. Really. I am. I love My Love. I love being able to write for a living. And I love knowing that my writing career is headed in the right direction. I suppose if I focus on these things, remembering that I chose them and worked for them, I might be able to see past the suffocating feeling I get when I realize the choices available in my own "Choose Your Own Adventure" story are slowly being whittled away.

Or maybe I just need therapy.

What I Really Want

While I was away last weekend enjoying a couple of days in Atlantic City with My Love, I received an email from a someone interested in hiring me for some technical writing work. Extremely excited that this person found me through my website and wanted to speak with me about some potential work, I contacted him and we set up a phone meeting. It seemed to be perfect timing, since I've been trying to build up my freelance business so that when I'm finally ready to let go of the full-time job I'll have some steady work to pay the bills.

Unfortunately, the new project wasn't meant to be. It turns out the company needs someone for this particular project who is available during business hours. When the contact told me this, I actually considered quitting my job and throwing my hat in the freelance ring immediately. The thought was fleeting, but I think it was pretty revealing. I think it gave me a real glimpse into what I really want for my life.

I desire so much to take on this "freelance thing" full-time. I know it will be a challenge, and maybe I'm naive to think that I'll be able to make enough money to live off of, but I want to give it a try. Sadly, that fear of not making it, of having to go crawling back to my full-time job--or worse to find another one--keeps me firmly planted in my chair at The Job with one foot over the freelance line.

Thankfully, this new contact is interested in using my services for future projects and asked me to keep in touch, which I'll gladly do. Maybe the right work will come along at just the right time and I'll be ready to take the step over that freelance line. In any event, I've made a new professional connection and that makes me excited for whatever might be around the corner.

What Does it Mean?

As a writer and reader, I spend a lot of time with words. Lately I've been thinking about those words and how we use them--to get across a meaning, describe an object, express a feeling. We use words in so many ways, but are we really saying what we think we're saying?

Words are tools, but they're not like hammers. They're much more flexible than that. A hammer is a hammer, no matter who is holding it. But words, they often take new shape depending on who hears (or reads) them. Words are constructs we've created to help us express ourselves more concretely. They're limited, however, by the understanding that the hearer or reader brings to them.

Take the word "pencil" for instance. When I write pencil, I have a specific idea of what that word represents (yellow, wooden stick with graphite in the center). You may have another (mechanical plastic stick with refillable lead compartment). "Couch" is another good example. When I hear the word couch, I attach the characteristics "soft", "plush", and "over-sized" to it. Someone else might picture a stiff, firm Victorian-style seat.

Realizing that such seemingly simple words can be misinterpreted or misunderstood, I'm beginning to wonder how we've managed to communicate anything over the centuries and eons that our language has developed. Each of us carries our own experiences, fears, knowledge and understanding to every word we hear, read or speak. How can we ever agree on abstract concepts like "God" or "peace" or "time," when "couch" and "pencil" aren't as concrete as we may think?

It's National Reading Day

March 2nd is National Reading Day, otherwise known as Read Across America. It's also Dr. Seuss's birthday. This is not a coincidence, either. Turns out the National Education Association planned it that way.

The goal of Read Across America is to motivate children to read and to help them improve their reading skills.

Motivating children to read is an important factor in student achievement and creating lifelong successful readers. Research has shown that children who are motivated and spend more time reading do better in school.

As you all know, I'm a book-lover through and through. And I love sharing books with the kids in my life. I'm the Aunt/Sister/Daughter who always gives books as gifts. I want everyone to love reading as much as I do. As much as I can, I especially try to share my love of books with my nephews and nieces. Unfortunately, they're all too far to read with on a regular basis. Today I might just have to call a few of them and read together over the phone.

Who will you read with today?

What I'm Writing at Blissfully Domestic

A few months ago I mentioned that I'd be writing for the Healthy Bliss channel at Blissfully Domestic, an online magazine for women. I realized today that I haven't really mentioned it in a while and thought you might want to know what I've been writing about.

You can view all my articles, or check out a few of my favorites:

• Before the holidays I wrote about holiday stress and exercise, holiday travel and healthy holiday cooking--all topics that can be applied year round.
• You can read about why I joined a CSA and how you can, too. (Now's the perfect time, by the way.)
• Today's article is on living in the now and how being mindful can benefit every area of your life.
• Finally, there's my ongoing cleanse series, where I describe my experience participating in a "whole body and mind cleanse" with holistic health counselor Amanda Moxley. These posts will be going up regularly for a couple more weeks, so check them out. And if you're interested in joining in on a cleanse group, Amanda's next program starts on March 4th. You can learn more at her website.

If you have any comments or questions, I'd love to discuss any of these articles with you. I hope you enjoy them.

Making Lemonade

I opened my mailbox today to find a comment from Over Coffee letting me know that she'd given me the Lemonade Award. Thanks, Over Coffee!

This award really couldn't have come at a better time. I've been feeling a bit out of sorts lately but this weekend was relaxing and productive, and even brought with it the possibility of a new freelance client. I also spent some time thinking about my freelancing future and tossing some ideas around in my head. Finding notice of that Lemonade Award in my inbox was like a message from the Universe that things are going to be OK. No, better than OK. Things will work out exactly as they're supposed to if I just get out of the way and relax a little.

As recipient of this award, this is what I have to do:

1. Thank the person who was so thoughtful for giving you this award by linking their blog to this post.
2. Put the logo on your blog or post.
3. Nominate 10 blogs which show great attitude/gratitude.
4. Link your nominee to your post.
5. Comment them to tell them about the award they've won.

Now, to pass this little award on to a few of my favorite blogging people. People with attitude and/or gratitude who inspire me and encourage me regularly with their words.

1. Biped Sideways
2. Cranky Fitness
3. Gumbo Writer
4. Jen Lemen
5. Katy
6. Mocha Momma
7. Calling Dr. Bombay
8. Magical Thinking
9. Kathryn Magendie
10. Louise
    

Thanks to all of YOU for being exactly what I need, just when I need it.

All Over the Place

For proof, go here.

And the Winner Is...

Jessica!

Jessica gets her very own copy of Perfect on Paper. Congratulations Jessica! I've sent an email to you requesting your shipping information. If I don't hear from you in 48 hours, the book will go to the person with the next highest vote count.

Thanks for playing everyone!

Have You Ever Seen the Grand Canyon?

Have you? I'm not talking about in pictures or on television or even from the air as you fly from one coast to the other. Have you stood on the edge of the huge Canyon and felt the wind swoop down and then back up again blasting you in the face with dust from thousands of feet below? Have you looked out across miles of rock that have been carved away by centuries? Have you?

There's something heart-stopping and, dare I say, spiritual about experiencing a sight like the Grand Canyon. It's awe-inspiring and humbling to walk to the ledge and look over the side of history into the depths of our world. From where you stand at the heights of Canyon, the rushing Colorado River looks like a tiny trickling stream and the clouds look like they're napping on the flat tops of the rock formations. Ravens play on the wind, swooping into protective nooks and crannies and then swooping back out to dance and swirl around.

The Canyon is so big, so vast, that it's hard not to recognize how small we really are. And yet, before We were even on this planet, time and water and wind were shaping and forming this land by doing nothing more than what they were created to do. And I wonder: can I have an impact like that, too? One of adjusted proportions, of course. But if I do those things that I was created to do, if I am me and nothing else, can I create beauty like that?

I believe I can.

I hope I am right.

Dating Horror Stories - Time to Vote

You all had such great dating stories to share and I'm so glad I don't have to chose the winner of this contest. It was hard enough picking just a few for the top slots! In fact, instead of three choices, you get four because I couldn't narrow it down any more.

While I loved them all, these were my favorites:

#1 was from Scribbit. This one was the first of several that made me laugh out loud. I can just picture this:

I can't remember how it happened but I ended up going out with a short Italian man who hardly spoke any English who drove me out to a lake and wanted to make out (ew) and when I told him I wanted to go home he ended up chasing me around the car for awhile thinking I meant "yes" instead of "no." He ended up taking me home but the evening was not a good one :)

#2 was from Jessica. Again, I laughed out loud imagining poor Jessica being mortified by her Aunt.

My FIRST EVER date was a movie date with a boy named Richard. (I think I was about 13?) My mom & aunt drove me to the movie theatre but Richard (who was supposed to meet me in the lobby) was no where to be found. Well, I was crushed but my Aunt was determined to figure out what had happened. She talked the staff into allowing her into the theatre (a fully packed theatre) and then proceeded to shout "Is there a Richard Shipley in here???" Sure enough, he was in the back row with some friends. I was mortified, he was mortified, we barely spoke during the movie and I don't think I ever talked to him again. My aunt and I still laugh about the experience!

#3 was from Amanda B., who had to get rid of creepy Mr. Octopus:

I had the guy pick me up from work (I got ready in the staff bathroom). For the date he took ne to his house to watch movies..lame but I had an open mind. Well, HE didn't want to really watch the movies. After repeatedly fending off tentacles,I told him I wanted to leave. Well, he told me no. So I screamed "Take me to my car", and when his roommate came to see what was going on, he said fine. So after he dropped me off at my car, I made sure to drive around so he couldn't follow me home. Then I never answered his calls again.

#4 was from Kelly, whose prom date was less than romantic. MUCH less.

Ugh. I met this guy online (this was maybe 8, 9 years ago) and after chatting for a few weeks, we arranged to meet. I thought he was cute, so we agreed on a movie.

Well, he asked me to meet him in a public place (at a mall). No problem. The kicker? He was going to get food at the food court for his dinner and said that I could sit with him while he ate "if I wanted," or I could go get my own food. Uhhhhhhhh. Right. I chose to shop for 20 minutes. Great start already, huh?

So we went to the movie and he was just trying the whole time to touch me, hold my hand, rub my leg, etc. Perhaps here I should explain that he was a pre-med student and just thought he was the bee's knees. After the movie, he took me back to my car. He asked for a hug, so I went to give him a quick one, and he just grabbed me and held on for what seemed like an eternity (30 seconds, a minute, I don't know). I could just tell he was going to kiss me (or at least try), so I stepped back so I could reach my door handle, said "OW" really loud, pretended my ankle had twisted, and swiftly opened the door and "fell" into the car.

He asked me the next day if I wanted to come "spend the night" sometime. He was actually so full of himself that he thought there was no way I was disinterested! What a CREEP!!

And now it's up to you, my friends. Read carefully, consider well and then cast your vote in the poll below. Voting will be open until Sunday, February 8th at 11:59PM. I'll announce and contact the winner on Monday, February 9th and the winner will have 48 hours to provide me with mailing address information.

Vote well!

*Voting is now closed.*

The Tale of the Coke Guy

I promised that if you shared your dating stories, I'd share some of mine. Well, in the interest of time, and of not digging up too many painful memories, I've chosen a single story that effectively illustrates my luck with the opposite sex (prior to meeting My Love, of course).

It was 1996 or so, and I was home from college for a weekend or a break. I'm not sure which. a couple girlfriends and I, who were known to drive around talking and listening to our favorite music, decided to stop in to McDonald's for something to eat. Instead of going in, we thought we'd go through the drive-through and sit in the car to eat--it's easier to chat and listen to music in the car.

I was driving, so I pulled up to the speaker and ordered our food, paid at the first window and crept up to the second window to retrieve our heart-attacks-in-a-bag. Then I pulled into a parking spot. We happily dug into our burgers and fries until my friend in the passenger seat said, "That guy next us wants me to roll down my window."

I leaned forward to see who it was, thinking I might know him from somewhere. He was frantically moving his arm in a cranking motion, so I put the passenger-side window down with the switch on my arm rest.

"Hi, do you go to [my college name]?" he called from his own car.

"Yeeeeaaahhh," I answered hesitantly, realizing he must have seen the sticker in my back window.

"Yeah, I thought so," he said getting excited. "I thought I recognized you."

"Oh, do you go there?" I asked, wondering where this conversation was going. He was semi-attractive, but I was getting more and more creeped out by the moment.

"No, I deliver Coke on campus. I've seen you in the C-store."

Now I was starting to wonder if I shouldn't just roll up the window and peel out of the parking lot before this lunatic got any funny ideas. The other girls were giggling quietly, no help at all. I did work at the campus convenience store part-time as part of my work-study and was in there pretty regularly for quick food between classes, but I didn't remember ever being in there during a soda delivery.

"Oh," I said, "ok. Well..." I started to blow him off, reaching for the switch on my arm-rest again when he interrupted.

"Hey," he yelled. "You ever go to [town]?"

"Uh, sometimes..." I said.

"I live there. My address is [address]. You should stop by some time. I don't have a phone or I'd give you my number."

I turned to my friends who were laughing audibly now. "Is this guy for real?" I whispered. "Did he just try to pick me up by giving me his address?" Then I called back to him, "Yeah, OK. Maybe I'll see you around." And I rolled up the window before my friends' laughter got out of control.

And thus began the legend of Ami's tool belt, where she quickly and aptly collected stories of all the tools that took interest in her. It filled up fast, let me tell you.

Got your own dating horror stories? Share them in the comments of the Bloggy Giveaways contest post and you could win a copy of Perfect on Paper.

A Review, a Guest Post and a Giveaway

*UPDATE*

It turns out that this week is the big Quarterly Bloggy Giveaways Carnival over at Bloggy Giveaways. Since I'd already posted this when I found out, I decided to jump in and modify this post to make it part of the Carnival. After you're done entering my little contest, head on over to Bloggy Giveaways and enter a few of the other contests and giveaways there!

*UPDATE*

Well, I'm back from Arizona with lots of tales and pictures to share. Hopefully I'll have time to start posting them this week. In the meantime, I thought I'd tell you a bit about a book I read recently, share a guest post from the author, and give you the opportunity to win the book.

The Review:

Perfect on Paper is a story about a twenty-something woman, recently left by her fiance and attempting to navigate the not-so-smooth dating waters of San Francisco. Waverly Bryson, the story’s heroine, is relate-able, sarcastic and ironic, and her dating mishaps and misfires keep you wondering if she’ll ever figure out that finding Mr. Perfect is less important than finding herself. Perfect on Paper was a quick-read with several laugh-out-loud (and quite a few cringe-worthy) moments. If you are now, or ever have, maneuvered through the dating scene, I'm sure you'll relate to Waverly's story in some way or another.

The Guest Post (from Maria Murnane):

I thought a guest post about dating would be appropriate. It's funny because now that I've written this book, people seem to think I'm an expert on dating, which is hardly true, given that I'm still single! Although I guess you could take that to mean that I'm really really good at uh, weeding out guys who are wrong for me...? Hmmm.

Anyhow, I have a ton of great (i.e. not great) dating stories that aren't in Perfect on Paper, and it's not just my female friends and I who have bad dates. So for a fun twist, here are three good (i.e. bad) ones from the male side:

1. Just the other day my friend Stu told me about a date his friend had recently been on with some woman. It was very new, not like they were "dating" or anything. I have no idea how this woman did this, but somehow she ordered her dinner TO GO and then told the guy that something had come up so she had to leave early. So she basically got this guy to buy her dinner without actually having dinner with him. Who does that??

2. My friend Greg asked a girl on a second date, for dinner on a Friday. She showed up with a small suitcase, expecting to spend the weekend with him. There's really not much more to say than that.

3. My friend Charlie has some CLASSIC stories that I will probably put into the sequel if I write them -- they are truly hard to believe. My favorite is this girl he dated twice, or maybe three times. She blew him off and said she was getting back together with her ex. Then about three months later he forwarded me an email from her that apologized for not having been "a good friend" and that she'd been "going through a hard time." The email was clearly a cut/paste job that she probably sent to everyone she knew - so classy. Then she went on to say that she had broken up with her boyfriend (who was apparently her meal ticket), and she now wanted to go to law school, so would Charlie be willing to lend her $1500 for an LSAT class? She would pay it back of course, and she'd be oh so grateful, of course. Uh, are you JOKING? Then at the end she finally personalized the email a little bit and she'd still like to date Charlie if he was interested. Nice touch honey. I'm surprised she didn't paste in the wrong name.

Those are just a few in a huge stack of many. I really do need to write a sequel to Perfect on Paper!

Maria Murnane, the author of Perfect on Paper, is currently an independent business writer and works mostly with technology and financial services companies, but like the main character in her book, she did spend a few years in sports PR. One day she quit her job and ended up in Argentina for a year, where she played semi-pro soccer and also wrote the first draft of what would eventually become Perfect on Paper. She has dedicated the book to any woman who has ever been on a really bad date or realized halfway through the workday that her skirt is on backwards.

The Giveaway:

Now here's your chance to win a copy of Perfect on Paper. Just share your worst (or best) dating horror story in the comments of this post by Tuesday, February 3rd at 11:59PM ET. Then I'll read all the horror stories, post my three favorites and let you all vote for the best (worst) one. The person with the most votes will win Perfect on Paper. I'll contact the winner via email (so make sure your email address is clearly visible in your profile or leave it in your comment). The winner will have 48 hours to respond with a mailing address so that I can ship the book. (US addresses only, please. Sorry to any internationals out there.)

I can't wait to read all your horror stories. In fact, I just might share my own this week. Boy do I have a few!

And if you're interested in learning more about Maria, visit Write Out Loud for an interview with her.

The Walmart Engineer

I was checking out at Walmart the other day, when the cashier, an attractive African-American man about my age, hit on me. I'm not usually good at picking up on these things, but I know he was hitting on me because he specifically asked me if I was buying the gift card I handed to him for my boyfriend. When I told him no, he asked, "Do you have a boyfriend?" To which I obviously answered, "Yes."

He was very charming and made me laugh with his insistance that he would make a much better boyfriend than the one I already had. He asked me what I did for a living, and I told him I work as a technical writer. And that's where this interaction took a surprising turn. He wondered where I worked and if they were looking for engineers.

"Why?" I asked, smiling and half-joking. "Are you an engineer?" He glanced around quickly, smiled back and said, "Shhhh..."

"Well, we're not hiring right now," I told him when I realized that he was serious. "But I'll let you know if I hear of anything."

As I walked out of the store with my bags in hand, the weight of that conversation struck me. My Walmart purchases had just been rung-up and bagged by a man with an engineering degree. Now mind you, I have no idea why or how Mr. Engineer ended up behind that cash register, but I do know that he didn't belong there. And not only did he not belong there, but it's likely that if the people who hired him had known he was an engineer, they never would have hired him in the first place. Talk about being overqualified.

I still see Mr. Engineer occassionally when I stop in to pick up a few things on my way home. I find myself using his presense as a guage of the economy. When Mr. Engineer is gone, I can assume that he has found himself a wonderful engineering position and that our economy is once more on the mend. It's probably not fair to lay my hopes for new jobs and economic recovery on the shoulders of a Walmart cashier. But he is an engineer, after all.

The Numbers Mean Nothing

I stepped on the this morning scale after a few weeks of avoidance. Who wants to weigh herself when she's been in "holiday mode" for two months? I've been eating like crap lately. I have very little self control. I've been craving sweets and carbs like crazy and I don't really seem to care what I put in my mouth. Sure, I still eat my fruits and veggies, but ever since Thanksgiving, my days have been filled with cookies, chocolate, and carbs galore. I'm not binging, not stuffing myself until I can't move, but I'm definitely not making regular healthy choices. I'm not exercising either.

Imagine my surprise when the digital screen on that scale showed me that my weight was...the same. Almost exactly the same as it was the day I left to go home for the holidays almost three weeks ago. I stepped off the scale and slid it back into the closet. And then I had what I like to think was a double-whamy "Aha!" moment.

Could it really be that I don't pack on dozens of pounds when I turn my back on the scale and stop worrying so much about what I put in my mouth? No, I'm not eating as well as, or exercising as much as, I would like but I'm not gaining weight by the minute either.

Then I realized that I weigh exactly what I did three years ago at this time. But how could that be? At that time, I was following Weight Watchers religiously and exercising obsessively. I was one to two sizes smaller (depending on the store and the cut) and much more sleek-looking.

This morning, standing in the shower washing my hair and contemplating the numbers on that scale, I realized just how misleading they really are. I know I'm not supposed to measure my health by the number on that digital read-out. I've heard it all before. But today it really smacked me in the forehead.

It's clear that my body looks better (and I feel better) when I'm eating well and exercising regularly. But how I look and how I feel has nothing to do with the numbers on that scale. Now let's hope I remember this the next time I get it in my head to weight myself and find the numbers aren't all that appealing.

They Say It's Your Birthday

Today is my 33rd birthday. I can barely believe that I've been on this earth for 33 years. I mean, wasn't I just in middle school?

I didn't do anything out of the ordinary this weekend to celebrate, although I did go see Yes Man with My Love, his daughter and one of his nieces. And tonight we're planning on a quiet dinner at Olive Garden. I know it's a chain, but I love the place and I haven't been there in years. I hope it lives up to my memories.

I also bought myself flowers this morning on the way to work as my gift to myself. They're part of my 101 Things in 1001 Days challenge (#87). Speaking of which, I created a separate blog where I can keep track of my 101 Things progress without bogging down subscribers' feed readers with rather regular updates to the list.

My big birthday gift to myself is a trip out to Arizona in a couple of weeks to visit my sister and see some amazing sites. I'm really excited to spend some time with Baby Sis and to enjoy some R&R. A week without work or any pressure to meet deadlines will certainly do this body good. And I'm hoping to take some fabulous pictures of the Grand Canyon while I'm there!

Here's to another wonderful year. Happy Birthday to me!

101 Things in 1001 Days

Happy 2009, everyone! I hope you all had a wonderful New Year's Eve and recovered quickly from all the *ahem* celebration. I had a quiet night myself and am looking forward to an exciting year filled with new accomplishments, lots of love and laughter, and amazing experiences. Which brings me to this year's goals.

I heard about 100 Things in 1001 Days a while ago and thought it might be something I wanted to participate in. When I was reminded of it a few weeks ago, I decided that I'd make my list and get started on January 1st. The list of challenging goals that are both specific and measurable and can be attained over the next 1001 days (that's about 2.75 years) was not as easy to create as I thought it would be. It took me several days and a lot of creative thinking and brainstorming. The list I finally came up with is below, and my one resolution for 2009 is to actively pursue my 101 Things Project and track my progress at the end of each month.

My 101 Things Project (January 1, 2009 to September 28, 2011)

The Mission:
Complete 101 preset tasks in a period of 1001 days.

The Criteria:
Tasks must be specific and measurable. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (they should take some effort).

The Key:
In Progress
Completed (Date)
Not Started

The List:

Health & Fitness

1. Lose 25 pounds. (0/25)
2. Participate in the CSA each year. (0/3)
3. Go skiing. (0/1)
4. Complete the Couch to 5K program. (0/1)
5. Practice yoga 3 times per week for 8 weeks in a row. (If I miss a week, the 8 weeks starts again.) (0/8)
6. Meditate 10 minutes every morning for 30 days. (If I miss a day, the 30 days starts again.) (0/30)
7. Participate in a 30 day fast from refined sugar. (0/30)
8. Give up caffeine. (0/1)
9. Take my vitamins every day for 45 days. (If I miss a day, the 45 days starts again.) (0/45)
10. Eat a vegetarian diet for 30 days. (If I miss a day, the 30 days starts again.) (0/30)
11. Pick 10 slow-cooker recipes and try them all. (0/10)
12. Do my monthly self-breast exams every month. (0/33)
13. Eat locally for one month. (0/30)
14. Participate in One Local Summer. (0/3)
15. Can my own preserves, fruit and/or vegetables. (0/1)
16. Give blood five times. (0/5)

Writing & Career

17. Take a writing course. (0/1)
18. Go to three writing conferences or retreats. (0/3)
19. Review and update my website at least once every 3 months. (0/11)

20. Finish the 1^st draft of my novel. (0/1)
21. Complete two rounds of edits on my novel. (0/2)
22. Prepare a proposal for novel submission. (0/1)

23. Submit FK essay to 10 more markets or until published. (0/10)
24. Submit FILWB essay to 10 markets or until published. (0/10)
25. Write book proposal for essay collection. (0/1)
26. Submit book proposal for essay collection to 20 agents or until accepted. (0/20)

27. Write and submit 10 separate queries for health and fitness articles. (0/10)
28. Write a short story. (0/1)
29. Submit an essay for “This I Believe”. (0/1)

30. Finish and submit C8ANY book proposal. (0/1)

31. Spend a weekend at a hotel (anywhere) writing. (0/1)
32. Set a writing schedule for one month and stick with it. (0/1)
33. Write and publish an e-book. (0/2)

General Self Improvement

34. Read 30 books. (0/30)
35. Buy a new digital camera. (0/1)
36. Take a photography class. (0/1)
37. Volunteer as a writing tutor or mentor.
38. Take knitting lessons. (0/1)
39. Knit a scarf. (0/1)
40. Knit a hat. (0/1)
41. Knit a blanket. (0/1)
42. Learn a new language (Italian) and carry on a conversation in it. (0/2)
43. Brush up on my Spanish and find a conversation partner to practice with. (0/2)
44. Turn off the TV at least one evening a week. (0/142)
45. Take swimming lessons. (0/1)

Household

46. Paint my dining room. (0/1)
47. Buy a dining set. (0/1)
48. Get 3 to 5 quotes for getting my roof replaced. (0/3)
49. Schedule the sump pump installation. (0/1)
50. Put up shelves in my office. (0/1)
51. Hang the mirror in my living room. (0/1)
52. Refinish the bookcase in my basement and move it to my office. (0/2)
53. Install the programmable thermostat. (0/1)
54. Get 3 – 5 quotes for central air conditioning installation. (0/3)
55. Finish landscaping the edge of my backyard. (0/1)
56. Clear out my “wild patch” and plant herbs there instead. (0/1)
57. Make my bed everyday for 45 days. (If I miss a day, the 45 days starts again.) (0/45)
58. Paint the kitchen. (0/1)
59. Paint the bathroom. (0/1)
60. Get my sewing machine fixed. (0/1)
61. Make curtains for my bedroom. (0/1)

Financial

62. Save monthly in a long-term emergency fund (for back-up when I go freelance full-time). (0/33)
63. Pay off my car. (0/1)
64. Reallocate my 401K funds. (0/1)
65. Pay off my credit card every month. (0/33)
66. Refrain from buying any magazines for 90 days. (0/90)

Travel

67. Travel to Italy and take a walking tour of Tuscany. (0/2)
68. Travel to Arizona to visit my sister. (0/1)
69. See the Grand Canyon. (0/1)
70. Travel to an island for a relaxing vacation. (0/1)
71. Visit my friend in New Orleans. (0/1)
72. Visit my friends in NC. (0/1)
73. Go to BlogHer. (0/1)

For Fun

74. Participate in NaNoWriMo. (0/1)
75. Get at least three massages. (0/3)
76. Plan a “me” day at least once a month. (0/33)
77. Participate in and successfully complete Project 365. (0/365)
78. Take a self-portrait every week. (0/142)
79. See three plays and/or musicals. (0/3)
80. Send 33 cards or letters. (0/33)
81. Write a secret and send it into Post Secret. (0/1)
82. Go to a concert and sing along to all the songs I know. (0/1)
83. Send a surprise care package to three friends or family members. (0/3)
84. Turn on a CD and dance in my underwear. (0/1)
85. Ask a stranger to tell me his/her story and just listen. (0/1)
86. Get a tattoo. (0/1)
87. Buy myself a gift/flowers on the 5^th of every month. (0/33)
88. Have a dinner party. (0/1)
89. Host a girls’ night. (0/1)
90. Compliment a stranger 33 times. (0/33)
91. Create 15 scrapbook pages. (0/15)
92. Create a vision board. (0/1)
93. Go to an NBA game. (0/1)
94. Sit in the stands for a Ravens (or Cowboys) game. (0/1)
95. Create 5 new playlists for my iPod with the following themes: Mellow Music; Dance in Your Underwear; Just Like High School; Summer Fun; Road Trippin’ (0/5)
96. Watch a sunset. (0/1)
97. Watch a sunrise. (0/1)
98. Go to the movies by myself. (0/1)
99. Meet a blog-friend in person. (0/1)
100. Track my 101 in 1001 progress monthly. (0/33)
101. Make a new list of 101 things. (0/1)

**Update: For more on my 101 Things list and my progress, visit my 101 Things in 1001 Days blog.**

Another Year Over...

It's time to say goodbye to 2008 and look forward to 2009. Looking back on my 2008 posts, I found the Year-End Meme that I completed last year, prompted by sognatrice over at bleeding espresso (who is continuing the tradition, as well), and decided to give it another go. As for 2009? Stop back later this week for my 2009 goals.

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?

Went to Dave & Buster's, ate at Benihana, read a personal essay in public, joined a CSA, started my own flower garden

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

As usual, I didn't make resolutions last year, per se, but I did create a Thursday Thirteen list of goals to accomplish in 2008. Without relisting them here, let's just say that (as usual) I did well with some of them and not so well with others.

I've decided to something a little different this year. I'll post about that tomorrow.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Two friends had a baby girls.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No, thankfully.

5. What countries did you visit?

None

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?

Last year I said, "More focus on the things that I'm passionate about." I'd say this year I could stand more focus again. I would also like to have more time with my family and friends.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

August 23rd - they day I held New Lines in my hand and flipped to my very first printed essay.
November 4th - Yes, we can!

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Getting my essay published in New Lines from the Old Line State.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Not getting myself into a regular exercise routine again.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Nothing more than a cold or two.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

A new laptop and docking station

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

The presidential candidates

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

Too many politicians to name

14. Where did most of your money go?

Into my house

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Planning a trip to visit my sister; having my essay published, reading that essay in front of real live people, and then reading it on the radio for everyone to hear.

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?

Bleeding Love by Leona Lewis

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: (a) happier or sadder? (b) thinner or fatter? (c) richer or poorer?

(a) happier; (b) I prefer to call it "thicker"; (c) richer...I got a promotion!

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Being present no matter what I was doing...also reading, writing, submitting my work, and exercising

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Watching television (this seems to be a theme); eating; wishing I was doing something else

20. How did you spend Christmas?

With most of my family in my hometown

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?

Still in love with My Love...and there was that stray kitty that stole (and then broke) my heart.

22. What was your favorite TV program?

Lost

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

No hate here.

24. What was the best book you read?

The Omnivore's Dilemma by Michael Pollan

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Alanis Morissette's "Flavors of Entanglement"

26. What did you want and get?

A great new haircut, new windows for my house, a kinder attitude toward myself, new writing projects and an essay published in a book

27. What did you want and not get?

An engagement ring (again), a healthier (thinner) body, a book deal

28. What was your favorite film of this year?

The Dark Knight

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 32 and spent the day doing mundane tasks.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

I had a really great year, but I think there are two things that would have made it more satisfying: 1) having been more dedicating to making healthy choices; and 2) having finished the book proposal project I've been working on.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?

I think I've become a bit more trendy over the last year, while still being relatively casual and professional. (Is that a concept?)

32. What kept you sane?

Cuddles with my kitty; time with My Love, my friends and my family; mini-vacations; blogging/writing; and lots of reading.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Paul Rudd

34. What political issue stirred you the most?

The Presidential election obviously

35. Who did you miss?

Several friends and my entire family. I felt very separated from important people this year. It wasn't the first year away from them all, but for some reason the distance seemed especially far.

36. Who was the best new person you met?

I met several wonderful new people in 2007, but there were four women in particular that had some major impacts on my writing, thinking and/or living: Ann Bracken, Lisa Spahr, Marion Winik and Amanda Moxley.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.

That gratitude is a powerful tool.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

I have been running so sweaty my whole life urgent for a finish line
And I have been missing the rapture this whole time of being forever incomplete.
(Incomplete - Alanis Morissette)

How do you feel about 2008? Did you do all that you wanted to do? Was it a good year? Are you ready for 2009?